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The Witcher 3 gets a bit silly in The Play's The Thing, and it's absolutely fantastic.
- The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt Guide
Navigation
- Onwards to A Poet Under Pressure walkthrough, or back to The Witcher 3: Act One - Novigrad walkthrough.
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The Witcher 3: The Play's The Thing Walkthrough
Our first step is to visit Priscilla in Novigrad and talk about Dudu. In one of those classic video game moments, you end up writing a play in order to lure the Doppler out of hiding.
Drama or comedy?
There is only on major decision to make here: drama, or comedy? SPOILER ALERT: skip past the italics if you don't want to know the outcomes of your choices.
- If you choose drama, a brawl will break out at the end of the play. This has no negative repercussions, really, and breaks up the talking.
Geralt doesn’t seem super excited about this process, but luckily Priscilla isn't actually interested in his input, so say whatever you like to the other questions.
When Priscilla has finished composing, deliver the script to Irina. The door is locked, so talk to the ticket seller. There's no way in besides coughing up 50 crowns for a ticket, for which you receive a measly 5 XP.
Next you’re off to hire some ushers – or more accurately, bouncers. I suggest saving when you arrive at the docks. Offer to try fighting the guys and see if you can win and get their services for free. If you fail you may wish to reload and pay them the normal rate. The fight’s not too hard if you are cautious. Keep circling so there’s only one able to hit you at any time, hit parry just as one attacks to trigger a small riposte, then hit him with two or three fast attacks. Immediately back off and set the same sequence up again.
However you achieve your ends, you're next off to hire the Puffins to spread the word. This section is optional, but as Irina tells you, results in a higher share of the profits at the end of the performance. Skip past the italics if you don't want to do it.
Enter the creepy looking building at the waypoint. The Puffins explain they’re too afraid to perform right at the moment due to a bit of intimidation by nasty gang. Go and find said gang just down the street. They really are unpleasant, aren’t they? It will be a delight to beat them up. If you use Axii in the conversation, you get XP but you still get to fight them, too! Hooray!
Back to Irina now, to report your success. You have to get involved with the casting, and learn, to Geralt’s discomfiture and apparent secret pleasure, that you’ll be in it. The choices you make here are of little consequence, except that you'll receive more money for casting Priscilla. If you really want the play to go well, though, pick Irina and Abelard.
When on stage, you get to choose between lines. It doesn’t matter what you pick, but if you choose the “wrong” line the crowd will react with confusion, and you’ll hear much funnier lines. Here are the "correct" responses:
- To slay beasts most foul...
- Perhaps 'midst the guests...
- Seems men's hearts...
- But a base heart...
- No monster is he...
Whatever you do, Geralt spots Dudu in the crowd and calls him onstage. Depending on your actions earlier, you may have a brawl now, but in either case, head backstage when you're ready to chat with the Doppler.
In the course of your chat, you can ask Dudu to show Geralt what Ciri looks like now if you like. This is a pretty emotional moment and worth seeing, i think.
When you finish chatting with Dudu, the quest ends and you begin A Poet under Pressure.
Back to Act I – In Ciri’s Footsteps
This quest begins once you’ve chased down Whoreson Junior in the Get Junior quest and dealt with Menge and the Witch Hunters in the Count Reuven’s Treasure quest.
Head to the Kingfisher Inn and talk to Priscilla to update her about Dandelion’s situation. You’ll decide that you need the help of Dudu, the Doppler, but can’t speak to him directly. Instead you’ll need to come up with a play to let him know you need help.
Priscilla is quite excited about the idea and asks for your creative input. You’ll get to pick the name and the genre. A comedy will give you the most XP and Crowns. If you choose Drama a fight will break out at the end of the play.
Once the script has been written Priscilla will ask you to take it to Irina Renarde who runs the theater. To get into the theater you’ll need to pay the Ticket Seller 50 Crowns or climb over the back walls.
Talk to Irina and tell her the plan. She’ll be happy to stage the play but needs help advertising the performance and ushers to keep the crowd in line.
Ushers and Puffins
To find ushers head to the docks and speak to a man called Sofus the Bull. You can pay 70 Crowns to hire him or fight him and Hal in a fist fight to hire both of them. If you lose they’ll cost 140 Crowns otherwise they’ll work for free.
The Puffins are unwilling to help because they’re being harrased by Fatso’s gang. Step outside and deal with the gang and then return to the Puffins. They’ll be in a much better mood and agree to help publicize the play.
The Play
Return to Irina at the theater and help her choose roles for the play. You will play the role of the Witcher. For the Princess you can choose either Irina or Priscilla. For the Doppler you can choose either Abelard or Maxim. For the best results choose Priscilla and Abelard.
During the play you’ll have a few lines of script. If you get all the lines right you’ll earn a total of 500 XP for this quest. If you mess up don’t worry, Dudu will always show up at the end.
After the play Geralt informs Dudu of their plans to free Dandelion. This ends the quest and beings the next quest A Poet Under Pressure.
Back: Count Reuven’s Treasure Next: A Poet Under Pressure