Can you wear a maxi dress to a cocktail wedding

Cocktail attire is generally associated with knee-length dresses, sophisticated heels, and simple suits. However, as one of the most popular (and versatile) dress codes, there are numerous ways that you can incorporate your own personal style in dressing for this type of wedding...starting with long dresses.

From the color and fabric of the dress, to the hairstyle and accessories you pair with it, a maxi dress can easily pass as proper cocktail attire, if styled correctly. Below are a few pieces of advice to make sure that you’re picking the right gown and accessorizing it accordingly for a semi-formal ceremony.

Seasonality Matters

If the wedding takes place in the winter, no one is going to bat an eye at the fact that you’re wearing a long dress—if anything, it’s likely expected. All that the cocktail or semi-formal attire request means in the colder months is that you’re welcome to pick a more casual option than what you’d choose for a black-tie event. For example, while you may have picked a silk, emerald green number for a black-tie wedding, you might go for a long, cotton gown with moody florals instead.

Pick Your Silhouette (and Fabric) Wisely

A fitted, full-length gown gives off a very different vibe than a flowy maxi with a slit. When planning what length of dress to wear, consider what would seem most cocktail-appropriate and feel the most comfortable to you. If you normally opt for more fitted dresses, maybe consider a knee-length shift or an A-line number, instead. However, if you’re comfortable in something with a lot of movement, then a lightweight maxi-dress is perfectly appropriate.

In addition to shape, fabrics play an important role in the overall formality of the dress. Fabrics such as satin, velvet, crepe, and organza are generally more suited for black-tie—unless you plan to really dress them down with accessories—while lightweight silk, cotton, and linen blends are much more fitting for a cocktail maxi-dress. Slits and high-low hems are also a fun way to dress down your ensemble, while incorporating a bit of personality.

Consider the Venue

Photo Credit // Chris Lane Photography

If it’s a backyard wedding or farm setting, then you might not want your dress sweeping the floor the whole evening (or have to wear heels to keep your hem clean). Once you receive the official invitation (or link to the couple’s wedding website!), look up the venue and try to get a good idea of the types of surfaces that you’ll be walking on. There’s always the chance that they’ll rent flooring for the day, but you don’t want to have to rely on it. If you go long, try something that isn’t a ground-duster, or opt for a pair of comfy wedges to add a few inches.

Opt for Alternative Colors and Prints

Because you’re picking a slightly more formal silhouette by going full-length, you can go a little more casual with your color and print choices. If it’s a spring or summer event, maxi dresses in terra cotta or mustard tones are great options, as are dainty florals in vibrant colors. For fall and winter events, jewel tones are always a wise choice, but long-sleeved dresses in moody florals and vintage prints are fun alternatives, too. If you do choose a print, make sure that you pick more subtle accessories so that the look doesn’t become too busy, or make it seem like you’re trying to steal the show.

Keep It Natural

If you’ve got your heart set on wearing a full-length dress, then keep your hair and makeup as laid back as possible. There’s a big difference between cat eyes and a tightly pulled updo, versus relaxed, tousled waves and some subtle lipstick. Details such as undone braids, beachy waves, and natural, kinky curls are great options to complement a less formal maxi. So long as you’re considering the seasons and venue, details such as a low bun, a little bit of extra eye makeup, or a statement lip can work, too.

Dress It Down With Accessories

Earrings, hairpieces, shoes, and bags are some of the simplest ways to dress an outfit up or down. Instead of a sparkly clutch, maybe opt for a relaxed crossbody bag in a fun color, instead. For a fall wedding, consider adding a sophisticated leather jacket over your floral maxi dress. A fancier alternative to a denim jacket, a leather jacket keeps you warm, but also ensures that you don’t look out of place. For a summer event, consider tasteful wedges or block heels in a fun print. Flats are also an option, if they’re polished enough (particularly if they’re in an unexpected fabric such as velvet or satin).

Cocktail attire is arguably the leader of all wedding dress codes, but when it comes to deciding what to wear as a guest, the popular choice can get tricky. With the help of a few etiquette experts, we’ve taken the guesswork out so you can choose an outfit with confidence.

What Is Cocktail Attire?

Cocktail attire is a balance between formal and casual and elegant and comfortable. To an event with this dress code, such as a wedding, men typically wear a suit and tie while women wear a cocktail dress.

“Cocktail attire is meant to bridge the gap between day and night,” explains bridal consultant LauraLee Baird. “It is still an occasion to dress up, but a full-length gown is not necessary. This merges the silhouette of a garden party dress (shorter) with the fabric and embellishments of a formal gown.” Think somewhere between a sophisticated formal occasion and office or party wear, adds Alena Kate Pettitt, author of English Etiquette: The Motivation Behind the Manners.

Still, with so much ambiguity, cocktail attire could mean different things depending on the venue, the time of day, and the season. Read on to learn more about deciphering this common wedding dress code.

Cocktail Attire for Men and Women

“The most important idea to take away from the cocktail dress code is that your goal is to create an elegant look wearing a knee-length, tea-length, or midi dress,” suggests social etiquette advisor Maria Lucrecia Arguello. “This is not the time to wear a gala gown or a short mini skirt.”

If you do opt for a longer dress, ensure it’s in a less formal fabric, as to not appear overdressed.

During the day, think natural colors and fresh styles and in the evening, feel free to utilize darker hues and embellishments such as sequins or feathers (so long as your dress doesn’t sweep the floor). Remember: The goal is to look polished and dressy, but not so much so that you take away from the bride.

When in doubt, your best LBD, a pair of sensible heels or dressy flats, some nice earrings, and a classy clutch will always work for a cocktail event, no matter the venue or time of day. In addition to a traditional cocktail dress, women can also wear dressy suits or nice jumpsuits paired with heels or formal flats.

All experts agree: a suit and tie are required for cocktail attire. Go with darker hues in chillier months or for evening events, but feel free to wear lighter grays or blues in warmer weather or for daytime celebrations. As for shoes, keep it classy with a nice pair of dark dress shoes that match your belt.

Still, even with more relaxed venues (such as a beach, barn, or vineyard), if the couple chose a cocktail dress code, it means a jacket and tie are a must no matter what. During the formalities, the jacket and tie need to remain on, advises Pettitt. “The only acceptable time to remove your jacket and tie is after the formalities have ended and the sun has gone down, and/or the groom or senior male attendants have removed theirs.” Traditionally, this means the jacket needs to stay on during dinner, but feel free to scan the crowd and if others are shrugging out of them before sitting for the first course, it’s fine to do so as well.

Cocktail Attire Etiquette

While a cocktail dress code isn’t as strict as white or black tie, it’s not an invitation to wear just anything. The bride and groom are expecting you to dress up for the occasion and this should be reflected in your outfit. Anything too tight, short, or revealing is a big “no,” as well as jeans, ripped clothing, shorts, and sandals (for men). 

“Having made an effort shows regard for the event, and creates a jovial collective mood for all those who attend,” says Pettitt. “Adhering to the dress code is not only polite, but it will help you feel at ease in your surroundings.” If you’re still at a loss, feel free to reach out to the mother of the bride or the maid of honor (never the bride) for further clarification to ensure you look and feel your best.

The venue will also give you a clue as to how stringent you need to be with your attire. “Read the invitation for the setting of the event as cocktail attire for an afternoon outdoor vineyard wedding would likely be less formal than the cocktail attire of an evening wedding taking place at a private club,” advises Baird.

FAQ

• What should I wear to a wedding with a cocktail dress code?

  When attending a wedding with a cocktail dress code, your goal is to look polished and put together but not overly elaborate. Take cues from details like the formality of the venue, the season, and even the vibe of the invitation to determine what to wear.

• What is summer cocktail attire?

  For a summer wedding with cocktail attire, opt for light and airy fabrics such as chiffon, linen, or organza. A floral maxi dress, a pastel midi or knee-length dress, as well as a jumpsuit are all great options. Elevate your look with simple accessories and a pair of wedges or block heels.

• What is semi-formal attire?

  Semi-formal attire is another term that is often used interchangeably with cocktail attire. Like a cocktail dress code, it represents the middle ground between formal wear and casual wear.

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