What positions are dangerous during pregnancy

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Bumping and grinding with a baby on board may seem kinda scary, especially for first-time parents, but rest assured, research shows pregnancy sex is totally safe. In fact, unless your doctor advises you otherwise, feel free to try out as many different pregnancy sex positions as you want over the next nine months, says Tami Rowen, MD, an OB/GYN specializing in sexual health at the University of California San Francisco. (For instance, if you're at risk for an early delivery, your doctor may recommend abstaining from sex entirely during the third trimester until around week 36, she adds.)

What's better: The sex can feel amazing—like, even more amazing than before you got preggers. That's because, during gestation, your body’s levels of estrogen and progesterone rise. Those hormones increase blood flow down there, which, in turn, ups vaginal lubrication and breast sensitivity, says OB/GYN Kecia Gaither, MD, MPH, FACOG, double board-certified in OB/GYN and Maternal Fetal Medicine, Director of Perinatal Services at NYC Health + Hospitals/Lincoln.

But even with all those pregnancy sex perks, you may also experience a change in your comfort level with certain positions, says certified sex therapist Donna Oriowo, PhD. "Because your body is changing, areas may become sensitive to the point of pain," she explains. "It is necessary to check in from week to week—and even day to day—to know what works, what feels good, and what doesn't."

So, while all positions are fair game, you've probably heard that it's unsafe to lay on your back after week 20. That's partially true—this can compress the vena cava, a major blood vessel that can impact circulation throughout your body, as well as to your baby. But, before it gets to that point, it'll likely feel uncomfortable, says Dr. Rowen. "There's this stereotype that you have to have sex from the side or behind, but you can have missionary sex if it doesn't last too long," she explains. "After five to 10 minutes, you may start to feel weird, and you can just shift to your side at that point."

Another thing to keep in mind: The cells on your cervix are more sensitive during this time, too, meaning they're more likely to bleed. You may notice some spotting after sex—don't freak. Instead, if you spot for any reason, call your doctor (even if you think it's sex-related), advises Dr. Rowen. And, if sex doesn't feel great now, that's NBD. Opt for outercourse, oral sex, digital penetration, and anal sex—all safe for pregnant women, she says.

Remember that sex can include toys, too, says Oriowo. She also recommends substituting your sex sesh with sensual touch and massages if you're too tired (it'll happen). "It’s a great way to connect and have intimacy without there being pressure on sex—especially since some folks find themselves way outside of the mood," Oriowo explains. "Try using oils that bring a different scent or even random objects that add to the feel, like feathers."

But if you're in the mood for some serious under-the-sheets action, go for it! "I think it's so important to have sex during pregnancy because it maintains intimacy in a relationship," says Dr. Rowen. "There's no reason to be scared of it." Plus, after you have the baby, you'll be abstaining from intercourse for about six weeks, so get yours now. Need some expert-approved inspo? Check out these 20 pregnancy sex position ideas that feel good and accommodate a growing belly:

This move is not only gentle, but it's a shallower form of penetrative sex than many positions (you know, in case you're still a little freaked out about baby getting poked in the head), says Ava Cadell, PhD, a Los Angeles-based sexologist. Plus, all that blood flow down there will make your partner's pelvis against your clit feel even more amazing than usual. The scissor position is a great option for couples having non-penetrative sex, too, says Oriowo: "It's also a great way to get full-on stimulation on the clit, labia minora and majora."

How to: Sit on the bed facing each other. Lift your partner's right leg over your left, and lift your right leg over theirs. Now, lean back, while your partner props themselves up with their arms. Then have them gently gyrate into you, rather than aggressively thrust. If lying on your back starts to feel uncomfortable, it's time to switch things up.

Soon, it may be tougher to lie on your back for an extended amount of time, says Dr. Rowen, so get this position out of your system before you have to make a change. With this move, your partner has full access to your breasts and nipples, which will be feeling super-sensitive, thanks to that fun estrogen and progesterone spike. So, have your partner reach down and stimulate them with their hands.

How to: Lie flat on your back with your legs in the air, criss-crossed or wrapped around your partner's neck, while they enter you with a penis or strap-on. Crossing your legs makes your vaginal opening even tighter, which will feel extra intense.

First Trimester: Cross Buttocks

Yep, this is kind of a crazy sex position, but why not go for it before your growing belly starts to totally take over your bod? Plus, a move like this requires some lubrication (read: lots of it), which all those pregnancy hormones will help you naturally achieve, says Dr. Gaither.

How to: Start out in missionary position, but before the action begins, have your partner shift sideways so that their legs and chest form a cross with your body. From there, they can thrust as normal with their penis or strap-on.

First Trimester: Propped Missionary

If you love missionary, then this is a fun (not to mention sexy) way to change things up, says Cadell. Plus, it lets your partner do all of the work, which can be a bonus if you're exhausted from, ya know, growing a human being.

How to: Lie down at the edge of a bed, chair, or couch, with your feet firmly planted on the surface or the floor and lift your pelvis. Your partner will get down on their knees or stand, depending on the height of the surface you're lying on. Have your partner grab your thighs and enter you with a penis or strap-on.

First Trimester: Anal Sex From Behind

Experts recommend giving anal sex a shot during your first trimester, explains sex therapist Deb Laino, PhD, an AASECT certified sex educator and doctor of health science. "Use coconut oil and ease in," Laino says. "If the anal sex feels good during your first trimester, it's something you can continue throughout the pregnancy." Plenty of pregnant women have anal sex in their third trimester, she adds.

Given the location of the anus, anal sex gives the pregnant person the ability to lean back a little bit more for enhanced comfort, Laino says. You can even use pillows in the front to prop up your or your pregnant partner's body.

How to: If you’re the pregnant partner, bend down while on the bed so that you are supporting yourself on your hands and knees. Once your partner has applied a generous amount of lube (you don’t want any friction here) to their penis, dildo, or other kind of penetrative sex toy, have your partner enter your from behind.

First Trimester: Missionary

If you’re pregnant, the first trimester is probably one of the last times you can safely and comfortably enjoy the missionary position, Laino says. “You want to avoid putting any pressure on the belly after your first trimester,” she explains.

And if you’re feeling it, you can even spice things up with some light bondage by tying each other's hands together or blindfolding each other to bring in some kink.

How to: If you’re the pregnant partner, lie in bed on your back. Allow your partner to enter you from the front, and from there they can move in and out of your body with whatever speed and depth is most comfortable for you both.

First Trimester: 69 Oral Sex

“Oral sex is a great way to get both intimacy and orgasm during your sexual experience,” Laino says. And with 69, everybody wins.

If you’re up for it, you can also add some anal rimming, or analingus (as in your partner licks your anus), into the mix when you've finished giving them head, Laino says.

Pro tip: Just make sure you do the rimming last. "You don't want the bacteria getting up into the vagina and infecting the cervix when pregnant," Laino says. Noted.

How to: If you’re the pregnant person, have your partner lie down flat on their back. Then, you can climb on top so that you're facing away from their upper body, giving you easy access to their genitals for sucking, licking, rimming, and the like.

Second Trimester: Doggy Style

Spice things up without going acrobatic. If you feel any ache in your back during this one, consider propping up your chest on some pillows, or trying the following rear-entry variation on this list, says Alyssa Dweck, MD, OB-GYN and co-author of V is for Vagina.

This is also a great position for the penetrating partner to stimulate the receiving partner's anus with their hands, Oriowo says.

How to: Get on your hands and knees, either on the bed or floor. Have your partner enter you from behind with their penis, a strap-on, or some other sex toy, like a vibrator. From this position, you or your partner can also easily add in some clitoral stimulation to take you straight to O-town using a hand or sex toy.

Second Trimester: Leap Frog

This sex position could also go by "I’m too tired to hold myself up," but it does more than give you a rest. It's one of the best positions during pregnancy because, by tilting your pelvis, it changes the depth of penetration to spice things up. Cadell recommends using a pillow to give your arms and head some extra support.

How to: Lie face down on a bed, with your knees bent and hips raised. Lean forward and prop your body up using your forearms and pillows. Have your partner enter you from behind, while also bending their knees.

Second Trimester: The Hot Seat

"The second trimester will show a little more of a belly bump, but it's still easy to maneuver around [for sex]," says Terri Vanderlinde, MD, a gynecologist and sexual medicine counselor. Enter, this uterus-friendly position.

Bonus: Your partner's hands are free to stroke your breasts and clit. And, if you do it in front of a mirror, it makes it extremely sexy and intimate.

How to: Have your partner sit on the edge of a bed or chair and lower yourself down onto their penis or strap-on, facing away. For maximum comfort, you might consider grinding on your partner rather than thrusting so you don't tire yourself out.

Second Trimester: Cowgirl

This move lets you set the pace and depth of penetration while giving your partner direct access to your breasts, which are more sensitive now than you ever thought possible.

Unfortunately, for same-sex couples, if the pregnant person prefers being on the bottom, it's not safe to do this position past the first trimester, says Oriowo.

How to: Have your partner lie down on their back, with legs outstretched. Then, spread your legs and straddle your partner's hips while facing forward. While kneeling, lower yourself down and begin riding up and down, as slow or fast as feels comfortable.

Oriowo says this sex position is perfect for growing baby bumps. "Spider facing each other is good for belly space and some mutual masturbation," she explains. "Try to maintain an angle so that the pregnant person is not laying down completely, but instead is more propped up." You can use pillows to prop yourself up if you don't want to use your forearms.

How to: Sit on the bed with legs toward one another, arms back to support yourselves. Now, move together and onto your partner's penis or strap-on. Your hips will be between their spread legs, with your knees bent and feet outside of their hips and flat on the bed. Now, rock back and forth.

Second Trimester: Face Off

"A front-facing chair position can actually be really great during the second trimester," explains Laino. You can even use a large loveseat with arms on either side, she says, to hold yourself up as you ride on top of your partner.

This position helps you feel physically close to your partner while also allowing you to control the depth of the penis or toy, since the pregnant person is on top, Laino says. Want to spice things up a bit? Laino suggests incorporating massage oils or sex-safe wax candles to rub all over each other. Very sensual.

How to: Your partner sits on a chair or the edge of the bed with their feet on the floor. Lower yourself on top of them into their lap, facing toward them so you're both looking at each other. Then, you can move up and down on your partner’s penis or stap-on at whichever speed is most comfortable or pleasing to you.

Second Trimester: Stand And Deliver

Standing during sex is perfect for the second trimester, since your bump isn’t *too* heavy yet, but you might not feel all that comfortable putting a ton of pressure on it, Laino explains. "It’s important to hold onto something during standing sex for support," she adds, which is what makes the stand and deliver position ideal: your partner holds onto your arms as they enter you from behind.

If you want to keep things interesting, have your partner reach around and give you some clitoral stimulation as well. "Try spreading your legs out wide, as it helps with balance," suggests Laino. "I would also recommend doing it next to the bed, in case [the pregnant person] falls over, so [they're] falling onto the bed." Remeber, safety first!

How to: While both of you are standing up, bend over at the waist, and have your partner enter you from behind. They can hold onto your arms, too, as it provides extra support for you both. If that isn't all that comfortable to you, lean onto a bed, couch, or table instead.

Second Trimester: Magic Mountain

Magic Mountain is "not as deep of a position," explains Jenni Skyler, PhD, an AASECT certified sex therapist, sexologist, and Director of The Intimacy Institute. "That's important for the pregnant woman who has pain with intercourse and deeper penetration. If she wants shallower penetration, this is it."

Given all the changes that happen in the pelvis during pregnancy, the shallow position can be really comfortable, and it also allows both the partner and the pregnant person the ability to touch themselves (breasts, nipples, clitoris, etc). during penetration for extra stimulation, Skyler explains. "It’s also a really relaxed position to keep in mind—a lot of women are tired when pregnant," she adds. Very true.

How to: Both you and your partner sit, legs bent, leaning back on your hands and forearms. Inch toward each other until you make enough contact for penetration, stare into each others eyes for extra intimacy, and let it all begin…

Third Trimester: Spooning

By lying on your side, you take any pressure off of your back and uterus (yessss) while still managing to get your belly out of the way, says Dweck. You can assume this position any time, but it’s best for the later stages of pregnancy since it’s super gentle and doesn’t allow for deep penetration, which can become uncomfortable.

Btw, Dr. Vanderlinde recommends always having a bit of a tilt, or a pillow, under the hip closest to the bed to keep the baby's weight off of your vena cava.

If you prefer to be the big spoon, Oriowo recommends tweaking the position a little: "Modify the spoon so it's more perpendicular than front to back. You want to give the belly some space!"

How to: You both lie on your sides facing the same direction, your partner behind you. Bend your knees slightly and push your butt toward them, so they can enter you. Adjusting the lean of your bodies will vary the angle of entry and help with rocking and thrusting.

Third Trimester: Reverse Cowgirl

This variation of your typical woman-on-top sex position keeps you in control while increasing clitoral stimulation, says Cadell. Depending on how much you lean forward or back, you can really change the angle to find just the right spot that feels good.

How to: Have your partner lie on their back with legs outstretched. Kneel next to your partner, then turn and and swing one knee over their body so that you're straddling their hips while facing their feet. Kneeling, lower yourself down, and begin riding up and down.

Third Trimester: Table Top

This position is great for the third trimester, since it provides a comfortable position for you and easy access for your partner, says Dr. Vanderlinde. (Now, that's what I call a win-win.)

How to: Sit with your butt on the edge of a bed, bench, counter, or table, with your partner supporting your legs. Make sure you have plenty of pillows or sex wedge behind you so you're not lying back flat. Have your partner enter you from this position. Easy-peasy.

Third Trimester: Mutual Masturbation

"In the third trimester, mutual masturbation is something that works really well," says Laino, since traditional penetration might no longer be an option given changing comfort levels and increased belly growth.

Instead, "a couple can kiss and touch each other while they're masturbating themselves to have an intimate sexual experience," she explains. You can throw vibrators or dildos into the mix as you mutually masturbate to spice things up even more.

How to: Lay next to each other on the bed, couch, or wherever else you find comfortable. Grab whatever toys or lube you might want to use, then, you can start masturbating side-by-side, touching or kissing each other periodically as you see fit.

Third Trimester: Cowgirl’s Helper

"During the third trimester, you might want to avoid deep penetration to avoid irritating the cervix," Laino says. "Women can have spotting during this time if the cervix is pressured." That’s why she recommends trying a position like Cowgirl’s Helper, which allows for more shallow penetration as your propped-up legs determine just how deep you allow your partner to go.

This position also has your partner help you by supporting your weight with their thighs, meeting you as you rise and fall on top of them. Make things interesting by adding a wearable vibrator to the mix or trying a water-based lube for reduced friction.

How to: Kneel on top of your partner, pushing off your partner's chest and sliding up and down their thighs. As mentioned, your partner can help by supporting some of your weight and grabbing your hips or thighs while they rise to meet each thrust. For even more comfort, consider propping some pillows beneath your knees so penetration isn't too deep.